AUTHENTICITY
‘Whatever ye are given (here) is (but) a convenience of this life: but that which is with Allah is better and more lasting: (it is) for those who believe and put their trust in their Lord’ [42:36].
It is risky business to gamble with our afterlife. And yet, every day, we trade in things that jeopardise our Hereafter.
Many of us still define and measure our lives and those of others by what Allah refers to as the conveniences of this life: wealth, property, status and beauty.
These things lull us into a false sense of security and often obscure our true selves. From amongst us, many don these falsities like suits of armour.
So, who am I really without my shiny automobile, my title, my beauty or my bank balance? What happens to my tawakkul—reliance on God’s providence when these ephemeral bounties vanish?
These questions are critical in determining my self-worth’s origins or the depth of my faith. It is when we shed these worldly trappings and move towards that which is with God that we begin to understand who we truly are.
THE POWER OF PENANCE
Seeking forgiveness is part of faith. We accept our fallibility and thus understand that repentance is part of a Muslim’s character. It is nothing to be ashamed of.
The Messenger of Allah (s) sought forgiveness daily: ‘I swear by Allah that I seek Allah’s Pardon and turn to Him in repentance more than seventy times a day’ [Bukhari 6307].
Before we can knock on penance’s door, we must activate two essential virtues: humility and willingness. Humbleness is necessary to acknowledge error, followed by a readiness to take ownership of our mistakes.
Our blunders can take two forms: transgressing the rights of God (ḥuqūq Allāh) and the rights of people (ḥuqūq al-‘ibād). Both require us to make amends, but there is a distinction: ḥuqūq al-‘ibād obligates us to seek forgiveness from the victim and God and to restore the victim’s rights. A plea of forgiveness to God alone is insufficient.
Recognising our inherent weakness is freeing. It liberates us from our ego and opens us up to the possibility of error.
It is a powerful experience when the veils of my misconceptions fall, and I concede that I err far more than I think I do and require much forgiveness. This insight allows me to break and open up to become more forgiving of others for their possible transgressions against me, understanding that, like me, they err, too.
Allah reminds us in a beautiful verse that should fill every believer with much hope, even those drowning and drenched in sin, to seek His forgiveness, and instructs the Prophet (s) to say: ‘O My Servants who have transgressed against their souls! Despair not of the Mercy of Allah: for Allah forgives all sins: for He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful’ [39:53].
‘Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them’ [James Baldwin].
Talk is cheap. Parents must understand that the best pedagogy is by example.
Children are mirrors. They reflect us. And if we don’t like what we see, there exists a high probability that the image accurately represents us.
Our disapproval subtly reveals another truth: we don’t like what’s within ourselves.
To be a role model for our children requires deep self-awareness. We will continue to broadcast conflicting cues that confound our children and hinder sound character development if we remain oblivious to the division between our speech and actions and don’t actively strive to unite them.
The word integrity means to integrate, to bring together, and to become whole.
May God grant us the courage to face the truth about ourselves and thus reflect a more honest picture to our children.
Until next week, InshaAllah
Zaahied Sallie
Author of The Beloved Prophet – An Illustrated Biography in Rhyme
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